I know I should not feel like I need to address this issue because it's pretty personal and none of my lovely readers and subscribers have mentioned it to me, but i'm pretty sure you have all noticed that I have put weight on. I have actually put loads of weight on (i'm not going to get into numbers because that would be over sharing) but it's safe to say I have put weight on, big time.
I'm not really going to go into the reason as to why, I think it was just a case of being really busy and not being as controlled as I normally would be that have caused the pounds to pile on. I have spent pretty much my hole life watching my weight and it does tent to fluctuate,but I feel like because when I started out on YouTube I was much slimmer, I now feel a little ashamed because I have put the weight on. I know that sounds really silly, but I feel like being in the "public eye" (ie, on YouTube) I do owe you a small explanation because i'm sure you have all been wondering but are all to kind to say so. Actually let me reword that, because some lovely guy on twitter recently had told me I need to lose weight (well he actually said I should loose weight, so we won't count that as he can't spell) and a few viewers on YouTube have left me comments saying what's up with weight loss and in a way, I wish I had never shared that side of me on my channel because I know feel I have failed people by letting myself go a little because I have been very public about my weight battles but that ship has sailed because I am what I like to call a "YouTube over-sharer" meaning, I find it hard to keep my mouth shut!
My weigh does effect me in most areas on my life, and YT is no exception because I can record a video, and then look back at it and think "Oh god I look huge" and it will bug me because i'm afraid someone will point it out, and that is also the main reason I am not doing many OTTD videos because I just don't feel comfortable and the weight also means that my fashion choices are not as chic as I would normally go for.
At this point you must be thinking "if your that down about, get off your ass woman!" and you would not be wrong. I am dealing with it and I KNOW I will lose the weight and feel better about myself but I also need to point out that i'm not really really upset by it because I don't feel down all the time, it's just every now and then......and it will change, I assure you.