Curvy and happy

This time last year I weighed in at a massive 70 kilos. Now when I say massive I mean for my ting 5 ft 1 and a half frame. I was a huge mountain of a girl and I had never been that big before.
This may be the beginning of the journey for me, the beginning of self acceptance but seen as how I’m sat hear looking at pictures and article of shrinking celebrities   I somehow highly doubt it.
You see, in my mind I have always been the “fat girl”. At the age of 10 I got my first period and therefore got boobs and a bum very soon too. I always loved the curvy hourglass shape women had but at the age of 10 11 12 I didn’t fully understand what it meant. it bothered people around me that I was a bit curvier then average and so it started to bother me. By the age of 13 I started dieting, silly stupid diets that involved a cucumber and horrid dry toast. Did it work? Yes. I lost weight and at the age of 14 I was around 8 and a half stone and everyone said I looked grate. But by then it had become clear to everyone that I have a problem. But the problem with so many of us is we are not anorexic or bulimic and super skinny, we r just insecure and our minds are so filled up and over occupied with how we should look that we can never stop and think that maybe, just maybe we are fine the way we are?
Why is it that we, as women have this constant need to better ourselves? We do we feel the need to compare our self’s to other woman? The answer is very simple: I don’t know.
I don’t know and you don’t know but hopefully at the end of this process maybe some of us should have an idea.
Why is this coming from and beauty bloger you may ask? I have dealt with this all my life and if I can help one girl deal with this, I will be more then happy.

take care xxxx


  1. Amen girl! Totally feel you!

    I blame it on those controlling our media.. They brainwash us into believing that there is one definition to beauty and that is wrong in so many ways..

    Confidence is beautiful.. Being comfortable with yourself no matter how tall/short thin/fat light/dark, that is beautiful..

    And what angers me sometimes is that fact that it is women who put other women down rather than embracing their uniquness..

    It's a tough world for a woman out there.. Despite what we believe, truth is not much has changed since the 40s or 50s.. Women are still being oppressed but now they do it indirectly without any of us even realizing it..

    Just my 2cents

  2. I was just thinking the other day, about how many women will die having never felt like they are beautiful, for more than the fleeting second.

    Yesterday we were looking at old photos and my aunt was saying how sad it was that in this picture of a thin and young looking her she thought she was fat and ugly. Presumably one day she will be lusting for how she looks now.

    Time is funny like that, hindsight is 50/50