To be completely honest with you, I’m not 100% sure where this blog post is going. You see, everyone knows that most women have body issues, but what we don’t tend to talk about is how big they are and how much they effect our every day life.
So many of us believe In positive thinking, meaning you tell yourself a bunch of sentences that sound like they came from a self-help book like “you must respect your body for what it can do for you” and “if you don’t love you no one else will” and I think here lays my problem. I’m not a fan of clichés, even though in most cases they are true. Another thing I’m not a fan of, and I hate myself for saying this is, the hole idea of women should be kind about other won because I really do believe in it, I really do, but when I’m having a bad day and I see some other woman I know looking naff, it makes me feel a little better (yes boys and girls, I’m a shallow petty woman underneath it all!)
As women you are told and in many ways brought up to not be “up yourself” but then as you get older, you are expected to be “kind” to yourself and “love the skin your in” and truth be told, I’m confused. I see these women who are so self-assured, calm about weight and in some cases just don’t care about their looks and I can’t help but wonder is it real? Is that self-love and appreciation real? Some say it comes with content, others say it comes with age but really I think it comes with willing to believe that like the L’Oreal adds say, your worth it. Many women I know have told me that at first glance, I come across very confident and someone has even told me I came across like I “loved my self” ( so not the case I can assure you) but the truth is like I said, women love to hate other women and the reason I come across like that is because I really make an effort. I don’t go to the super market bare-faced and in jeans and an old jumper, and if I go out I do dress up (more than most, which people find really funny) but it’s not because I love myself, it’s more a case of loving getting dressed up and made up and wanting to feel good about myself. I know how to in most cases, pull myself out of the “I’m feeling fat” mood and move on, but it does effect me. No one understands really, most defiantly not men. I love my boyfriend to bits but when I’m feeling like that he can’t see what my problem is and just looks at me and on a good day says “I think your perfect” and on a bad day says “stop going on there’s nothing wrong with your thighs!” (and I am aware that I’m lucky in that area, a few girlfriends have told me lately that their men will tell them they are getting bigger and I think I’d be really upset if mine told me that!) I know I’m not an overweight huge beast of a woman, I just have a little more flesh that I would like…..but that’s the trick. To trick yourself out of your overweight huge beast moments in any way it takes. A good tip I like to focus on is when you are feeling too fat for sex (don’t look shocked at your screen I know you all feel it sometimes and this is a safe zone!) Try and focus on things like being totally fuzz-free, soft silky smooth skin and a touch of fake tan……….it really works and if worst come to the worst, just put the lights off! Lol.
I’m think I’ve rambled on way to much now and this post may not make much sense but I think just honest talking is so therapeutic, and I love talking to you all about our complex body-issues.
Take care,
xxxxx
I must say, I just LOVE how honest you are! :) I can totally relate to everything you wrote, and I'm sure most women would too but somehow we're always afraid of saying what we *really* feel! It's like we have to be perfect all the time and that's just not real! I have my "shallow,petty" moments as well and I think it's normal because we're under so much pressure to be a certain way, and look a certain way...it can be a bit overwhelming!
ReplyDeleteThanks for your tips on getting out of the "fat mode" lol,when I'm having a bad day it's really hard to make that effort but I will try! :)
xxx
I completely understand what you mean by always trying to look good out in public. Ive been with my soon to be husband for 5yrd now and I still want to look goodinfront of him not only to keep our relationship alive but it makes me feel sexy.
ReplyDeleteThank u for being so genuine. :)
XXXX
Christyna <3
V, thanks for sharing this. Really. As Su says above, we love how honest you are, with yourself and us too.. it really helps, nobody is alone and I really feel it when I read post like this.
ReplyDelete(sorry for my bad english: italian speaking here)
:)
Rachele